Please NO FORWARDS

I have something I need to get off my chest.
I hate Forwards. You know the little stories that are supposed
to bring a tear to your eye.
Or a goofy picture of a cat reading the newspaper.
Or even the heartfelt, compelling appeals to boycott all the companies
who worship the Devil.
No matter what it is, if it is being sent to numerous people, and passed around,
I don't want it.
If it's a message that you MUST send on, or something bad is going to
happen, definitely do NOT send it to me. I am not afraid to break the chain.
If it is a chain recipe exchange, I will be the person who fails you miserably.
If it's an e-mail about how just simply passing an e-mail around will somehow
get you a new car, or thousands of dollars, I need to break some bad news to you...
nevermind.

It's okay if you like Forwards. We can still be friends.
I think the world is divided into two groups. People who like Forwards,
and people who talk about people who like Forwards.
But some of the people I love most in this world are in that group,
and to you I say "it's okay!"

Just please don't send them to me.