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Monday, February 12, 2007

What would life be like if you had a personal assistant?

Think about it.
What if you had a personal assistant to do all those little things that you just can't seem to squeeze in everyday.
I think about it. I don't think Business Executives should get personal assistants, I think Stay-at-home Moms should have them! That's right! We've got it all backwards. I think I would name mine Shirley. See Shirley's picture? She's good at everything. She's here a lot, so she's NOT too attractive, but has the telepathic ability to anticipate my needs, like Radar did for Colonel Potter.
My life would be so different!
For example:
-I wouldn't go three months past the suggested date to get the oil change on my car.
-My refrigerator would be cleaned out long before it reaches that disghusting mystery smell stage.
-Our broken lamp would get a new lamp shade put on it, instead of the broken one remaining forever and it falling down at the most innoportune moments.
-Prescriptions would be picked up on time.
-I would actually go to the doctor or dentist when needed.
-Our printer would never run out of ink.
-Pictures would be printed, scrapbooking would be updated, letters would be sent.
-We would never get a notice that says our power could be turned off soon.
-I would have new shampoo; the good kind from the mall. (The mall is too daunting a place with four kids, but it's not a problem for Shirley.)
-Patches would be sewn onto my kids Awana's vests securely, instead of patches hanging by a thread and screaming to everyone "My Mom stinks at sewing!"
-Closets would be organized.
-Cleaning out seasons of clothes, storing them in their storage bins, and replacing them with new, season-appropriate clothes would be a breeze. Love that Shirley.
-Best of all...there would be absolutely NO CLUTTER in my house. Not one out-of-place stack of anything. That's Shirley's forte. De-cluttering.

What would your life be like with a Shirley?

15 comments:

Lesa said...

Hmm, I'm hoping to find out very soon. You see, my mom's name is Shirley, and she and my dad are coming for a visit in a couple weeks. They haven't been here for 2 years. What's on Shirley (and Lee's agenda)? Putting up the light fixture that's been sitting around for a year. Replacing broken light globes (is it 3 or 4 now). Cleaning food drops off the kitchen mini blinds, and maybe that vent at the bottom of the fridge. Maybe even the red goo from marschino cherries in the fridge. I will get all the Christmas decorations put back (there's still a few, such as the runner on the wet bar that has so many things on it I really didn't notice it until recently). I want to show my mom how scrapbooking works, and maybe get her to scan those old pictures I brought back here to work with a year ago. The boxes are still on my dresser, beside the mismatched socks. I actually threw socks away! Each child has a sock basket, and as I have a few minutes to sort, they go in color coded baskets. I recently sorted mine. John's mom was here recently, so all the laundry actually got done. This meant all the socks that had been visible were washed. The mismatches for the boys were tossed (boy, that was hard). Mine are on the dresser. I don't know why it's so hard to throw away socks! So it's hard to say what else Shirley will help me get accomplished, but I'm sure looking forward to her 2 week visit!

BTW, as for scrapbooking, Treston's digital photo album is nearly done. I've been playing with it this week (much more fun than going to bed), and I think I'm happy with all the pics - now to get his letter included. Digital scrapbooking has it's place!

Garratts said...

I have a bone to pick. I just noticed that your link names of all your friends blogs all have really cool names except ours. Like wonderful, cute, sweet, and bombastically cool.

I am really hurt.

Why can't we be great garratts or glad garratts or groovy garratts.

What is up with that?

Your left out friends,
the just plain ol garratts

Jennifer Bacak said...

Are you serious? The friend who didn't tell me she was pregnant?
And in my defense, Heather put those links on my blog before I knew how. Notice how she put herself as Bombastically cool? Not my doing.
I will change your name pronto. I think YOU guys are bombastically cool!
jenn

Garratts said...

No, I am really not serious.

I know, I know. I just don't pick up the phone and call people to tell them stuff. I am kind of private like that.

I would have only called you if I didn't think I was going to see you. So see I wanted to tell you in person.

And yeah, change that pronto! HA HA!

Jon, Sally, & Jude said...

Well Ashley, you can't fault Jenn... If she had a Shirley it'd already be done! Man, we sure do need some Shirley's around here! Or maybe we'll start with the money to have a Shirley...we'll take that first.

If I had a Shirley my house would already be packed and perfectly organized. The painting would be finished too. I would return items before the crazy target return policy rejected me. Jude's outfits would be ironed and hanging. And my husband would have a nice breakfast every morning. My hair would always be fixed and makeup on. Oh, and I would get to workout EVERY day.

Come to think of it, I was a Shirley once. I cooked, cleaned, did laundry, did the grocery shopping. ...you name it, I did it. She even let me drive her uber-nice SUV and take her credit card to p/u things for her. She actually had two Shirleys...one to iron ALL the laundry (literally ALL...underwear included) and deep clean and me who did EVERYTHING else. But I do have to say, she had the money...but for some reason she didn't give it to me!!

Poor Shirley. Oh wait that was me. I resolve to only have a Shirley if I can pay her lots of money. ...which means, really people, I'll just never have a Shirley.

Maybe I should quit now while I'm BEHIND...I don't know how you people do it with three, four, five, and six kids!!!

Arlene said...

I want a Shirley and I don't even have four kids...man, I'm in trouble!!! aren't I?? my Shirley would definately be in charge of my move and taking care of all those details for me when I'm sick...and hey, maybe she could work for me so I could pay school and my clients better attention!! I feel like we're on the Jetsons...hahaha

Whitney said...

jenn, i don't know if you remember me or not, but I'm Kathryn's dear friend whitney. Just letting you know, your blogs bring me to life :)

Hendrick Family said...

I didn't put ALL those links on there. One day Jenn didn't even know her own blog address and then the next thing you know, she is a blogging Queen.

Now...if I had a Shirley...

I would also need a Lavern. One assistant would not be enough!

Garratts said...

I am still waiting to not be just "The Garratts"

What is up?

Jennifer Bacak said...

Ashley- Keep your pants on! It's changed! With a little Tony the Tiger feeling to it.
jenn

Jennifer Bacak said...

Whitney- Of course I remember you! You don't get down and crazy at Body Jam with someone and forget.
Thanks for reading my blog!
jenn

Kathryn Berilla said...

Who will ever forget Body Jam...If I had a Shirley, she could do all the cleaning and cooking and I could go to the gym and do Jam, Combat and when Heather can go back to the gym and work off her Manatee...Belly Dancing!!!!

Garratts said...

I feel so special now! Thanks!

texasmcvays said...

I think we should all pitch in and share a Shirley!

Ashley, I hope you get a wonderful new 'handle'

Kyle

Melodi said...

Share a Shirley? She would be so tired after leaving my house that she would crash and never be heard from again.

Pregnant? Ashley is pregnant?????