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Thursday, February 19, 2009

Birth Families

A few months back, we had the chance to meet and connect with some of Justus' birthfamily; his aunt, uncle, and cousins. We had never met them face-to-face before, but had heard a lot about them from Kathleen, Justus' birthmom. They are very close, and I think it meant the world to her for us to finally meet.
They live in Las Vegas, but came to Texas to visit family over Christmas, and made a special trip here to meet Justus. We met at a Chic-Fil-A, and got acquainted.
They were so excited to get to see Justus, hug him, talk to him, and see two little boys, biological first cousins, play like boys in the play area.

Birth families are a blessing. Having a link to their story, another piece of the puzzle to who they are, is so good for my boys! Justus has the same nose as them, which is precious! His nose is one of my very favorite things about him!
Now let's be honest, not every piece of their puzzle is pleasant. I know this. But it's all a part of who they are. Luckily, this was a wonderful piece of Justus' story, and we were so lucky to get this afternoon with them.

New Life does a good job of encouraging connection with birth families. They facilitate visits with all of us, which is unbelievable for three women to do with all the families they place with. That adds up! There are just so many hours in a day, for goodness sake! But they also plan the Kinship Picnic, which is coming up in March. This is a very natural, easy place where birth families and adoptive families meet up at a park near New Life and the kids play...the adults chit-chat...we eat fried chicken...and life is normal. At least almost. This is brilliant, if you ask me!
Also know, that some birth family members may not be healthy enough or making good choices and we may choose not to meet with them when it's not in the best interest of our kids to do so. We are not blind and foolish. We wouldn't put our kids at risk for any reason! This is all about them, and about sharing Jesus with their families! But there are extreme circumstances where we may choose not to visit if we feel it is unsafe.

For the most part, so much good comes from these connections with birth families. The Gospel is shared. People are saved. Sometimes, a birth family member sees a healthy family up-close for the first time in their lives. A birthparent whose heart is aching to see her little one slide down the slide and play with their siblings has that chance. I am excited about meeting up with some of Treston's birth family at the Kinship picnic. (Pictures will follow.) God has been good to bless us with birth family members for both our boys. HIs purposes in adoption are many!


Anonymous said...

That is so cool, Jenn! :)

Hayley said...

I'm right there with you when it comes to the WONDERFUL connections that come with knowing birthfamilies!

A great friend adopted through Arrow--a CPS-contract agency--and they have no contact with her daughter's birthfamily. Just the other night they sat looking at "tiny baby" pictures of her three biological children. Hannah said, "Mommy, where are my "tiny baby" pictures?" My friend said it broke her heart to have to tell her that she didn't have any of those pictures.

What a blessing it is for us to have pieces to the puzzle that others don't! We'll see you at the picnic!