Wednesday, July 12, 2006
If a Tree Falls, and there's no one around, does it make any noise?
Okay, you know that saying, if a tree falls, and there's no one around... Well, my predicament is, if you catch a fish, and there's no one around, does it count that you caught the fish? Do you get fish credit?
Here's what happenned.
The theme for tonight did not have much to offer my kids, so we decided to go fishin' instead. Now fishing it supposed to be peaceful, quiet, relaxing. But not if you're taking three little ones with you. The event is filled with knots in your fishing line, several near-death experiences with Emma's hook while casting her line, and Justus using a fishing cane pole to stab everything and everyone. However, the kids are useful for helping catch bait. That's their favorite pass-time anyway, so we finally got some poles baited and ready to go. (I like the fishing, but no way I'm baiting my own hook.) So Rusty had some near bites on what he's sure is an enormous Bass, toying with him. Me nothing. He's using the fancy pole, with a reel and everything, and I'm using the plain old cane pole. Just throw it in. But as the games of the evening are released, kids stampede toward the clinic for their injuries and illnesses to be attended to. For the first time all week, Rusty is called away to the clinic. He has to see an 11 yr. old girl who has had some bee stings, and is hyper-ventilating. (He said rich kid medicine is a little different from his real life.) So he leaves me standing there, with my three little "helpers", cane pole in the water. I ask him as he's running away, "What if I catch one?" with a hint of sarcasm in my voice, because what are the odds? (We didn't catch anything last year.) But off he goes.
Low and behold, I'm trying to keep an eye on my kids, and when I look back at my bauble, it's under water completely. I get so excited, I start to scream. I pulled my line out of the water, and there was a fish. A big fish. I'm screaming bloody murder, totally freaking out. I've only caught a few fish in my life, and never while I'm standing there without fishing assistance. I'm screaming, and this fish is wriggling all over the place. It hops off my hook, and the children all run over to it. Emma is hollering at me to let it go. She said that's what Daddy says to do, and he makes the rules. However, I want to try to catch it in the net because if it goes back in, who will see it? I don't mean to discount my children as people present, but one of these little people doesn't talk at all, except for the phrase "MMM, BOP" lately (maybe because he's a big Hansen fan, but we're not sure), and the other two live in an imaginary realm almost all of the time. They could tell Daddy that we caught a fish...and an octopus too. And it's in their pocket, see? So you see my predicament? The fish is lying on the bank, wriggling around, looking up at me with one eye, like "Lady, make up your mind." I don't know for sure, but I really think it was mocking me.
Well, sadly, the fish did wriggle it's way back into the water, and disappeared out of my sight. In a moment, the whole entire victorious fishing moment was gone. No evidence. Nothing. And that was the last of the bait, so I didn't even have a second chance.
I knew right then that I was going to be one of those pathetic fisherman, telling the story, and holding out my hands to say, "It was this big", and people would yawn and roll their eyes. And I would say, "But...the kids saw it...right Justus?" "MMM, BOP" will be his only reply. I felt sad.
By the time Rusty made it back, Jax had taken his cool new Superman fishing pole, (thanks to Lisa and her friend Chris) and woven an invisible obstacle course through the trees with fishing line. It took me 10 minutes to unwind it all. I was so frustrated, and MAD that he wasn't there to see my fish, and be impressed with me!
Rusty didn't quite understand. "You're MAD that you caught a fish?" He could care less if anyone is there to see it if he catches a fish. But I am looking for fishing credit. Girls, do you feel me?
Okay, highlights for the day:
Emma: archery, hitting the bullseye! That's right!
Jax: Lifeline, the evening "service" you could call it, where they sing songs and hear a message. (The theme was Christmas, and he is half-expecting Santa tonight. He may be disappointed in the morning.)
Justus: I'd like to think swimming in "Wacky World" with me, jumping on the water trampolines. But when I asked him he said... you guessed it..."MMM, BOP."
Jenn: Catching a fish, even if nobody saw it.
Rusty: Taking Justus down the big waterslide, the "Zamboni."
Peace out, my friends! I'm so thrilled that y'all are reading this, and I LOVE your comments!